Updated: Feb 22
I believe the number one question many of us have asked is, “what is my purpose?”. We pursue higher education, make powerful connections, and even work high paying jobs in hopes to find fulfillment. This is the story of my life.
I can remember one day telling my father I wanted to be a landscape architect. His response to me was, “naw son, I see your younger brother doing that”. He went on to suggest I go to school for business. You see, my father is a hard working man. I’ve seen him wake up 3am in the morning to make sure he perform the work for his clients.
My father had a janitorial business while also balancing a 9-5. Not only did he clean buildings, he also had a lawn care service, painting company, and a mechanic/auto repair business. From my perspective, I would say he was doing well.
But something my father told me was, the reason he suggested I take up business is because he didn’t have anyone to help him understand business. Yes he was making a lot of money but he never learned how to run his businesses. From a father to a son, he was only trying to guide me so that I wouldn’t make the mistakes he made in life.
Let’s talk more about pursuing your life’s purpose. I took my father’s advice and decided to pursue business in college. I received a full ride scholarship to play basketball. After a year of playing, I made the choice to join the military. Truth is, I had no idea what I really wanted to do. The college I was playing basketball for was going through changes and making scholarship cuts. I didn’t want anyone to control my narrative so I joined the Navy.
Fast forwarding, after serving for a total of 7 years and also working for the shipyard, I started to feel this pulling. There was something missing. Yes I was doing something I enjoy doing outside of working a 9-5, which is music. But I knew there was more.
In order to get to purpose you have to go through self healing...
I started having dreams about my future. I was running into people who inspired me to see and dream bigger. I could feel my life changing fast. The thing about it, I spent a lot of time at work. Instead of working 9-5, I was working 12 hour shifts, Sunday to Sunday. I was consumed by my job. The money was good and I was happy to contribute financially to my household.
After coming out of a season or stretch of making 6 figures, I knew my time was coming to an end. I could feel it. After talking with my wife and also praying about it, we decided that it was time for me to leave my job. Truth is, I wasn’t ready. I had so much fear. I was so afraid.
The time my son had heart surgery at birth was scary but the truth is, leaving my job was scarier than that moment to me. When my wife and I made the decision for me to leave my job, we had to think about our 4 small children. At the time they were ages 4, 3, and a set of twins who had just turned 2. My wife and I didn’t know how we were going to make it through that transition. All we had was hope and fatih.
My wife and I entered a long 3 ½ year process. We experienced a lot of frustrating days and restless nights. Instead of sitting and waiting for something to happen, we begin to build and heal. We started focusing on the foundation of our businesses and pursuing healing in our marriage.
During that process, something we found out was, in order to get to purpose you have to go through self healing. When you start to understand yourself and your identity, you begin to understand your life’s purpose. Truth is, your identity is tied to purpose.
Pursuing life's purpose is scary. The journey is unknown. In many cases, the road is lonely, especially when pursuing something new. There were many times I wanted to give up. My wife and I had to endure so much stress and anxiety. We knew we had to keep pushing. Instead of looking at purpose as a destination, we started experiencing purpose during the journey.
We’re now in year 4 since I left my job. Has it been easy? No, not at all. But I can tell you that it’s so worth it! I’ve never been so free in my life. I’ve heard this saying so many times “there’s light at the end of the tunnel”. I can agree! When you choose to pursue your life’s purpose, you’re going to have dark days. You may even feel like you’re by yourself at times. My encouragement to you in this moment is, you’re not alone while on this journey called purpose.
3 Ways to align with your life's purpose:
Change your mindset: Truth is, if you really want to understand your life's purpose you have to challenge your perspective. What is influencing the way you view your purpose?
Change your environment: Sometimes your environment can frustrate your life's purpose. Start surrounding yourself around people will challenge where you are.
Remove fear: Truth is, pursuing your life's purpose is scary. You're stepping into the unknown. When you make up in your mind that you won't allow fear to shape your future, you will begin to see life form a different perspective. Death to fear!
To learn more about the process of pursuing your life’s purpose, schedule a time to talk with me 1 on1. I would love to share more about my story. I want to see you win! My life is the evidence and I’m an open book. Let my story compel you to move and soar in purpose.